Finding Your Strength
Happy Monday friends!
I firmly believe that one of the biggest traits we are supposed to develop in life is strength. Life is tough. We all have days where we don’t feel adequate and then days where we feel like we can conquer the world! For most of my young life I’ve felt everything from resentment to frustration at the ability that others seem to have to avoid the bad days. However, I have come to believe that avoiding these bad days and realizing how to turn those bad days into new opportunities is a skill we can all learn to develop. As I sat down trying to figure out the best way to express my feelings on this, I came across a story by someone I admire that helps explain how to get through those less than average days and avoid having them so often. So without further ado, here is the story of the three sisters as told by Dieter F. Uchtdorf.
“A long time ago in a distant land lived a family of three sisters.
The first sister was sad. Everything from her nose to her chin and from her skin to her toes seemed not quite good enough to her. When she spoke, her words sometimes came out awkwardly, and people laughed. When someone criticized her or “forgot” to invite her to something, she would blush, walk away, and find a secret spot where she would let out a sad sigh and wonder why life had turned out to be so bleak and cheerless.
The second sister was mad. She thought of herself as very smart, but there was always someone else who scored higher on tests at school. She considered herself funny, fair, fashionable, and fascinating. But always, there seemed to be someone who was funnier, fairer, more fashionable, or more fascinating. She was never first at anything, and this she could not endure. Life was not supposed to be this way! Sometimes she lashed out at others, and it seemed that she was always one breath away from being outraged by one thing or another. Of course, this did not make her any more likable or popular. Sometimes she clenched her teeth, tightened her fists, and thought, “Life is so unfair!”
Then there was the third sister. Unlike her sad and mad sisters, she was—well, glad. And it wasn’t because she was smarter or more beautiful or more capable than her sisters. No, people sometimes avoided or ignored her too. They sometimes made fun of what she was wearing or the things she was saying. They sometimes said mean things about her. But she did not allow any of that to bother her too much.
This sister loved to sing. She didn’t have great pitch, and people laughed about it, but that didn’t stop her. She would say, “I am not going to let other people and their opinions stop me from singing!” The very fact that she kept singing made her first sister sad and her second sister mad.
Many years passed, and eventually each sister reached the end of her time on earth.
The first sister, who discovered again and again that there was no shortage of disappointments in life, eventually died sad.
The second, who every day found something new to dislike, died mad.
And the third sister, who spent her life singing her song with all her might and a confident smile on her face, died glad.”
After reading this story I realized that I have been all three of these sisters at different moments in my life. During high school and college, the sad and mad sisters really made an appearance even if I didn’t always let it be known. I look back and realize I placed way too much importance on what other people thought was cool, and very little importance on what I thought would make me happy.
Like the sad and mad sisters, I was always looking outward, always watching other people and trying hard to keep up with them and do what I thought would make me the most accepted. It took me a while before I realized that these other people really didn’t care about me or what I did or didn’t do. I learned that I needed to stop letting my happiness be dependent on others and find it for myself.
When I moved to NYC and started to really follow my passions, dreams and-as cliché as it sounds-my heart, I felt more and more like the glad sister as the days progressed. I tried to find what made me happy and resolved to share that with others! I figured out that there would always be a detractor or two, but that these people didn’t have any good reason to influence how I felt or what I did. I was on my own path that I knew made me happy and would continue to let me grow and find what I needed. Now I try now to be glad, no matter what’s happening or who is trying to bring me down. I hardly ever see the mad and sad sisters now, and when I do, I try not to let it be a very long visit! What’s the difference? My perspective and my commitment to look inward and find happiness even in the toughest circumstances.
So remember: Life is tough, but so are YOU.
xoxo
Bree
Wearing all Amari Active > amariactive.com
